The Meditation Game, Part 2: Starting

This post is a follow up to Part 1, and something I don't do much anymore: a "how-to." 

It is, not to put too fine a point on it, a way to organize a beginning approach to meditation. Because frankly, the staggering amount of information on meditation makes it challenging to know where or how to start - and starting is all you need to think about, if you're new to the process. I'm hoping to take some of the pressure off by giving you a little step-by-step (with the caveat, always, that you may devise another way to go about it). 

And let's revisit the why. What does meditation have to do with an organized life?

It's crazy simple: my clients who meditate regularly see results. An enhanced ability to pause. A keener ability to observe and check in with themselves. All of which, in turn, leads to greater ease in making decisions. That's not to say that it's impossible to make progress with your stuff behind the stuff if you don't meditate. Still, it's another tool in the toolbox, like a solid and reliable hammer that helps you to build your structure.

Take the weight out of this - most of us are not training to be Buddhist monks. It is not about religion (although contemplative prayer is related and can be very supportive). There is no passing, or failing, or "Best Meditator" award. To begin, all you're looking for is
​

• a few moments of quiet, and 
• a sense of the present moment

So, the following is Sara's How To Start Meditating, version 1.0. Pick a start, any start:

• I think beginning with guided meditation is easiest. You can sit back, relax, and let the teacher do the talking. You don't have to sit and wonder what your brain is supposed to be doing as the seconds tick by. The teacher keeps the time, encourages you, and often has a way of describing that opens up things you haven't considered before.
• Begin in a place with few choices. I don't think you have to start with anything lengthy. See what five minutes will do. Then seven. Then maybe ten. Here's a site I like. Start with the first one.
• Or, try making a guided meditation of your own, or ask a friend with a nice voice to make it for you. Grab the voice recorder on your phone and read one of these meditations (click "Transcript") slowly and thoughtfully. Commit to playing it every day for a week, and see what happens. I've done this a few times - I'm not crazy about hearing my own voice, but I don't totally hate it either. In fact, I like to think of it as part of acceptance thing. Speaking the words out loud can be powerful, too.

OK, you've taken a little bit of the mystery out and satisfied yourself that meditation doesn't have to be boring, scary, or heaven forbid, woo-woo. Next, I might suggest an app. 

Might.

I never start out recommending meditation apps because they have so many bells and whistles and…choices. Meditation apps are usually digitally cluttered messes, so buyer beware. But kind of like when you dig through the Everest of paperwork on your desk and find that elusive set of notes from the conference, or the last letter from your grandma, or your passport, there are gems to behold and take delight in.

​Set aside an afternoon to do some exploration and learn about the different features. No kidding - an afternoon. This process is as much a self-care piece as planning your meals or figuring out a workout routine. Reserve time for this. Here are my thoughts on three of the top-rated ones:

Headspace - Lots of folks swear by this app. It offers a "Basics" series of meditations that are very brief and approachable - we like brief and approachable. You can pick a male or female voice (ack - another choice - oh well). Headspace has a nice reminder feature, too. Skip the "Sleep," "Move," and "Focus" areas for now. Forget about "Buddies" - we are learning to meditate. We can make friends another time. On the other hand, all the wacky colors and smiley faces may not be your aesthetic. The notifications may become so ubiquitous that you'll eventually ignore them. Also, this is what it set up for my profile. What the...?

My take: This is a good one if you want to be directed and led gently into the process without a lot of seriousness. Good for kids, too. A fair amount can be done for free, or $95/year to unlock everything.

Calm - I think this app is the one that's trying to disguise itself as something else (what, I have no clue) so that you don't get turned off by the fact that you're actually meditating. The interface is slick and attractive, but it's hard to know where to start if you're a newbie. There is meditation, but also...music, breathing exercises, check-ins, stretches, and something called The Spark (which seems to be mini motivational speaking segments). The sounds and visuals are indeed, calming. Warning: anything with a lock icon will invite you to fork over the $69.99 after a seven-day trial,  and almost everything has a lock icon. If you like the looks of this one, sign up for the trial and set a BIG reminder at five days to either let it continue or cancel the subscription if you're just not feeling it. 

My take: It is well-named and seems to have solid content, but there's very little you can explore for free.

Insight Timer - I'm biased because this is what I use. Even so, I will say that it is really easy to get lost in this app. There are over 60,000 free guided meditations, plus a regular-old timer (for when you want to try something other than guided). Even the timer has choices. But, this one is all about mindfulness. There are some talks, live events, music, and many courses - but no one will be reading you bedtime stories or sending you push notifications reminding you to be kind to yourself. It, too, has a community, but I locked my profile down as hard as it could go because I don't care about connecting. I do like sending the occasional "Thanks for meditating with me" message to someone in Rio de Janeiro, or Omaha, or Vancouver. I like seeing the map pinpointing everyone who is using the app to meditate around the world. To limit your overwhelm on this one, go to the "Search" icon and then the panel for "Learning to Meditate." It's all right there, much of it free, but since I use it daily I pay the $58.99/year for everything.. 

My take: Well, you just read my take. It's my favorite. But I don't recommend it until someone has established a bit of a practice. 

Once you have an app pretty well figured out, you can build from there. We'll talk about where and when in another post.

Things to consider when you test out a guided one:

• If there are noises around you, let there be noises around you. If your child (or your confused dog, or equally confused spouse) wanders into your meditation space, it doesn't have to blow the experience. Acceptance is key, and resistance is futile, so let them know you're having a moment of quiet and tell them to move along. 
• Every time your mind wanders, it's all good. Really. It's another opportunity to notice, and bring it back. 
• There will be meditations you choose that you don't like. Let them go. As we say in Nashville, they can't all be hits.
• If you're just not into the words, or your mind won't stop wandering no matter what, or you fall asleep, that's all good too. Tomorrow is another day.

Give it a start. See what happens. And if you've found another method or app that helped you to get started, share it with us in the comments.